How do you Love an Ugly Person?

My grandma is suffering from dementia which makes her highly annoying at times, esp when it comes to money matters. First she implicitly accused my mom of stealing her money which went missing every other day. When she went back to visit her sister in CHina, my poor grandaunt, a simple down-to-earth lady, was also accused of stealing my old grandma's money. It turned out that she had a bad habit of stuffing her money everywhere, including her chicken of essence box, without remembering where and how much she has left at each location. Every sane person in the family knows she has this bad habit except the culprit herself. So effectively, she is accusing and bitching about everyone else in the family but no one is really paying attention to her at all. Could you blame us for not being more sensitive and kinder towards her? It's zhi pian, zhi dao, zhi yian, hao ma?! It is no wonder that even my mild tempered Godly mommy Cham couldnt help but raise her voice at her.

It is even harder for me (or maybe the rest of the family) when all she talks about everyday is how bad this uncle or aunty is, how stingy that person is, how ugly my sis' ex bf is etc. It is nothing but negative comments from her about other pple that I happen to quite like. Now that I am at home 24/7, I get the full blast of her bitching every hour everyday! I almost lost it when I was cooking dinner the other day, and this old shrunken grandmother of mine couldnt stop telling me how inadequate my cooking skills were. I, me, Cham Hui was cooking, not for the first time, not just for myself, but for my family for the nth time already! I admit I am not the best cook around but she made me feel like a toddler all over again. Not protected, but restricted. If Freddy wasnt around I would have screamed in her face so loudly that she'd be indefintely deaf from that point on.

So, how do you love an ugly person? How do you love a closed one who has an ugly and unlovable character?